Things You Learn About Yourself

While I was in England, I took around 4,000 photos. No, I'm not kidding. Since my return home, I try to spend a little time each day going through the photos. It isn't a task, really, because I enjoy looking at them and reliving the moments of my trip. I'm learning things about myself as I go through them. Odd things. Interesting things.

One thing I've learned is I am strangely attracted to taking photographs of flowers growing where they shouldn't. I mean, I take the normal nature photographs in gardens and parks, but I seem to always find some obscure flower poking out of a crack in concrete or a small crevice in a rock. I can't tell you how many pictures I took of flowers growing out of street walls in England. Not exactly a big tourist attraction, if you know what I mean.

I am aware I am doing it, of course, I just didn't ask myself why until...someone else did. It was a fisherman in Newlyn - a true, blue, dressed-in-work-clothes-and-big-yellow-rubber-boots fisherman sitting on a bench by the side of the road. He didn't ask me why I was taking pictures of a wall. He couldn't. I was too busy taking photos. It was my friend, who was patiently waiting for me, he asked, "Does your friend like the wall?" She explained that I like the wall and the flowers. The man seemed puzzled, "Hasn't she seen a wall and flowers before?"My friend smiled and tried to give him a brief explanation. She told me about this little conversation after she'd gotten directions from the helpful fisherman, and we were continuing our walk to the next town.

I laughed when she told me and wondered how many good English people had wondered about the strange American woman taking pictures of odd things, laying on the ground to get a good shot of something, or speaking to her friends in "y'all"s and "ma'am"s. It wasn't until I'd been home awhile, and going through my photos, that I heard the fisherman's questions in my head again.

I began skimming through all my photos from the two weeks. In almost every set of outside photos, there they were - flowers growing in unlikely places! I'll be the first to say they weren't all good photos, but...I still liked them. In some cases, I had taken the "pretty" shot - including the flowers as background/foreground - before taking one of just the little flowers, focusing on them instead of the bigger picture. Just for me.

I decided to look at other trips I've taken in the past and found that I had the same type of pictures mixed in with those, as well. They weren't  photos I took because I planned to frame them or show them to other people, I took them for my own pleasure. As I said, I liked them.

So,...the question I asked myself was, "Why?"

The answer came to me as I looked at picture after picture and began putting them all together in a group: I admire the little flowers. I truly admire them - not for their beauty (although I do find them beautiful), but for their strength and their endurance. They have not been cared for and cultivated in a garden. No one made sure they had the right amount of sunshine and water and fertilizer. Everything you see was brought forth by effort and stamina.

After all these lovelies have been through - bad weather, heat, cold, and very little room for growth - they keep coming back every year. They lay dormant for a season (a rather long, cold season in England), but some part of them hangs on and pushes back through to bloom in due time. They don't even have a deep root system in which to depend on! It's funny, if you think about it. They thrive in a little dirt and dust between the cracks, adding softness and beauty to the rough landscape around them. They are quite determined to flourish, even in the most difficult of circumstances.

I think there's a lot of really good lessons in all that, don't you?

By the way, I have a bare wall in my new library room that needs some pictures. I wanted to have "just the right" photos from my travels to put on that wall, but...I'm thinking it's not always about hanging the perfect photo on the wall. Sometimes, it's a good idea to display perfect reminders about the importance of finding the beauty in life and learning to have "just the right" attitude about your circumstances, along with a good amount of determination and motivation to thrive.

Planes, Trains, and Books

I have so many stories I would like to share with you from my recent travels. I write them in my head as I go about my days, but haven't quite decided the order in which to tell them...

Why not start with what I already promised you (a book review), along with a bit of a story from my travels? Yes, I like it - let's go with that. :)

I had a difficult time with the thought of leaving my Patrick Rothfuss book behind unfinished when I left for England. I have the large, soft cover edition,...and it IS rather heavy. My husband encouraged me to "just download the book" on my Kindle and take that instead. From the look on my face, he knew there were just some things you don't "download"...and a book I have already started reading in print form, which already has a numerous collection of sticky notes, is one of them. Smart man that he is, he just shrugged his shoulders and told me to figure out how I wanted to pack it for a carry-on bag - along with sticky notes, highlighter, and pen/pencil. Like I said, smart man. ;)

I knew I would have good reading time on my plane and train travels, but little did I know my book would spark such interesting conversations. Although, in all fairness, I think my numerous tabs drew more attention to the book than anything else. Most people who approached me began with some reference to why I had so many pieces of paper sticking out of my book. Still, I enjoyed each and every conversation about my book...and my stickies!

On one of the trains in England, I had a lady ask me about my sticky notes. When I explained to her they mark great quotes, delicious words, and things I want to research later, she began to tell me about her love of words and the things she studies. She told me she studies translations and old Hebrew language. She explained how the language is so concrete - so literal. I found it very interesting and had her write down a couple of the language symbols in my notebook.

On another train, while I didn't have any conversations about my book, I was pleased to find an extension to my tray which held my book quite nicely. I said to my friend, Arhonda, "Wow, isn't this nice? They give you an extension to hold your book!" Then, I had to kind of chuckle at myself as I realized that the extension was probably there for a laptop - I noticed the little rubber stoppers on the square edges. In my opinion, though, it is best used for a good book! ;)

As for the good book itself, I thoroughly enjoyed The Wise Man's Fear! In all honesty, there was a couple of places in the book where I thought the pace could have been picked up a bit (or a journey not taken quite so long), but I think that is a preference to be determined by each reader. For instance, a battle scene may seem too long to me in an action film but, to someone who loves that type of thing, it may seem too short. You know what I mean?

Overall, I was very pleased with the book and love Kvothe all the more! Who wouldn't? I enjoy reading about him, his adventures, his friends, and the things he learns about life as he goes along. While it is a medieval story, it is more about the human heart than it is anything else. Rothfuss has a way with words that makes me lay my hand across my heart sometimes when I read. He also makes me smirk with a sarcastic gleam in my eye and makes me giggle like a silly school girl. To read his words is sheer delight to me. I wallow in them. (If you don't believe me, look at the pictures of the tabs in my book. The hot pink ones are used to mark favorite quotes. Does that tell you anything?)

By the way, I finished the book on my flight back home from England. I had a flight attendant approach me, point to my sticky notes, and ask, "Are you doing homework or reading?" I smiled, as I always do, and said, "I am reading for pure, unadulterated pleasure,"...which began another conversation about the book and why I tab. This conversation ended up involving a couple of other passengers and another flight attendant.

I am happy to say that the end result was a small group of readers sharing what books they like and why. It's amazing the wonderful people you meet on planes and trains with just a big book and some hot pink post-it notes. I'd say it was well worth the extra weight I had in my carry-on bag. ;)

A quote! A quote! I must have a Patrick Rothfuss quote:

     The wood was the color of dark coffee, of freshly turned earth. The curve of the bowl was perfect as a woman's hip. It was hushed echo and bright string and thrum. My lute. My tangible soul.
     I have heard what poets write about women. They rhyme and rhapsodize and lie. I have watched sailors on the shore stare mutely at the slow-rolling swell of the sea. I have watched old soldiers with hearts like leather grow teary-eyed at their king's colors stretched against the wind.
     Listen to me: these men know nothing of love.
     You will not find it in the words of poets or the longing eyes of sailors. If you want to know of love, look to a trouper's hands as he makes music. A trouper knows.

Too Much Fun?

Is there such a thing as too much fun? Probably not. Still, I feel I have been on a wonderful merry-go-round that I really need to stop and step off of it for awhile to take a breath. After my trip to England, I spent a few days in San Antonio with my husband, which were delightful, and I have been out and about in Texas since then!

You see, it is highly unusual to have weather that's NOT "too dang hot" in Texas in July. Normally, we have temperatures of 100 degrees plus. This has not been the case for the past week. It has been, what is commonly known at my home as, "perfect Jeep weather" days! This means that instead of spending time indoors (and on my computer), I have enjoyed the great outdoors with the top off the Jeep and a camera in my hand!

While I was out riding around yesterday, I thought about you and my blog. I wondered if I made a mistake in not taking you with me to England or to San Antonio. I thought of how I could have blogged a daily journal, of sorts, while I was in England and how it might have drawn in more readers that find travel as fabulous as I do. I questioned if I made a mistake in leaving my laptop behind.

I answered my own question: No, I didn't make a mistake. It was the best thing to do.

I was living my life, absorbing every moment and, as much as I love to write and share my experiences, technology can begin to take over your life if you let it. I refuse to let it. Life is important to experience without wondering if something would make a good picture for your facebook...or your blog. I took around 4,000 photos while I was in England, but - I can honestly say - they were for me. I don't mind sharing some of them, of course, but I took pictures of what I enjoy, what I wanted to remember, and what brought me the greatest joy.

It also isn't fair to the people in my life to not be present in the moment. My husband is a patient man who understands my interests, but he doesn't want to go on vacation to watch me stare at a laptop screen and hope I can find Wifi somewhere at a coffee shop. It isn't fair - not to him and not to me. Besides, he is already gracious enough about seeing my face behind a camera much of the time. :)

Brief example/side bar: We went to a wonderful lake/state park yesterday, and we were having a great time! At one point, I found a good photo shot. I took out my phone (instead of my camera) to take a picture, so I could share the view on facebook. Now, there was a good reason for this - I have teacher friends who are off for the summer. I wondered if any of them had thought of this place as a great place to hang out with their families. Many times when they share where/what they've done, I go to places I wouldn't have thought of before.

When I tried to post in on facebook through my phone, I found that my data source wasn't working from our beautiful view. I got a bit...agitated. When we headed back to another part of the lake, where there is a lovely beach and little store, I knew I could probably get data access in that area. I asked my hubby, a little too snappy, to find a shade spot so I could post the picture. 

Now, how wrong is that? Very. Could it have waited until later? Yes. Was I taking something away from enjoying our trip? Yes. Did I catch myself, apologize to my hubby, and put the stupid phone away? Yes. 

I met lovely, interesting people along my journeys. I want to share those experiences with you, but I didn't go out of my way to have experiences so I could blog about them. I had them because life brings new people in your life when you open yourself up to new experiences. When you don't have your nose in your laptop, your phone, or...yes, even sometimes,...a book, and you take a look at the world around you, you'll find it is quite fabulous!

If you have enjoyed my blog up to this point, I just want you to know I'll be posting a good bit for the next week. In other words, more than usual. I have some stories and photos I'd like to share with you. While I didn't take my laptop on my adventures, I did take my trusty pen and paper. There were moments and words I just didn't want to forget. Stories I heard I just had to jot down. History I wanted to explore after only hearing the 'tip of the iceberg'. Good stuff. :)

My husband has been on vacation this week, which I have greatly enjoyed, but he goes back to work on Saturday. This means the pace of my summer break from work will find a nice, slow, lazy wallow I enjoy. Time for slow mornings with a cup of coffee and a good book. Time for writing and blogging and catching up on facebook newsfeed to see what my friends have been up to lately. Time for getting together with friends and, maybe, catch a movie.

Vacations and holidays are fun, but..."there's no place like home." :)

I'm Baaaaack!

I am back from spending two glorious weeks in England! My trip was so wonderful I find it hard to put into words! I am going to tell you all about my trip, but not yet. You see, I'm still taking a couple of trips around my own country before settling in for a bit. I also need to go through the 3800 pictures that I took and choose just a few to share on here. (No, I'm not joking,...I really took that many pictures plus a few more!)

For today's blog, though, I would like to share some things I bought in England. Can you guess?

That's right, books! I don't call myself a born bibliophile for nothing, you know. In case you're thinking to yourself that I could easily order the same books online, and even get them from a bookstore in the United Kingdom, you would be right. It wouldn't be quite the same, though - not to me.

There is something special about going in to any bookstore, but it is even more wonderful to go in to a bookstore you're not familiar with. It is interesting to see what they focus on or show on their display cases the most. I found the English are quite proud of their history, as they should be, and they have a vast amount of history books displayed beautifully.

When I went in to Waterstones Book Sellers in Loughborough, I was looking for a specific book. A friend of mine told me about a book her husband's relative had written that was only available in the U.K. The book I wanted was My Secret Sister by Helen Edwards and Jenny Lee Smith. It is a non-fiction book about twin sisters who were separated at birth. I was pleased to find the book easily and to find it is very popular in England.

While looking for this book, I happened to glance up at another shelf and found The Secret Keeper by Kate Morton begging me to take it home. Truth be told, I was attracted to the cover before I even noticed the author's name in large letters on the front. I have all the other Kate Morton books except for this one, and it had a cover that reminds me of the lovely English gardens I had been enjoying in my journey across England. I'm sure it was fate. ;)

After finding the book I wanted (and the one I didn't know I wanted until I saw it), I found myself going to the children's section. I do love a good children's story! The bookstore had a display of books I could not resist! I had trouble choosing just two and made sure I took pictures of the rest to order later. (I mean, let's be reasonable,...there's only so many I could fit in my already overstuffed suitcase,...along with the English china I bought and had to get back without breaking.)

I can't say enough about the two children's books I bought: The Worst Princess by Anna Kemp and Sara Ogilvie and The Pirates Next Door by Jonny Duddle! They are wonderfully written and illustrated. If you don't believe me, I can already give you a second opinion. My daughter, Katie, is 22 years old and loves a good story. When she saw the two books in my library, she was instantly attracted to them. She wanted to read them, so I asked her to read them out loud to me. I watched her as she read and her face lit up at the story and the pictures. She commented on how she liked the rhyme scheme, the characters, and how the illustrations were different in each book but suited so perfectly for the stories. I would say that's "two thumbs up" from both me and my daughter on both books. :)

I'll let you know my review on the other two books once I've had a chance to read them. I did finish The Wise Man's Fear on my holiday, but that's a story for another day. I promise to talk about that book next time. I will also share some of my stories and pictures from England over the next couple of weeks.

I'm On Holiday!

I am currently on holiday in England. I meant to blog about it before I left the States, but was rushed at the last minute and forgot (that is another story to tell you when I'm not blogging from the keyboard of my phone). I did not bring my laptop with me, as I did not want to worry with it while traveling around England. Besides, when I write, it seems to suck all my time away, and I'd rather forgo the temptation and enjoy being outside in the English countryside and coast.

I look forward to sharing some of my adventures and photos with you when I return next week!

Cheerio!! :)

Saying Goodbye

One of the ways I help my students say goodbye at the end of every school year is by helping them understand what their yearbook/annual is for. The first year I taught sixth grade, I noticed that when students got their yearbooks, all they did was sign their names on one another's pages. They had no understanding about the importance of saying goodbye in writing, of sharing their thoughts on paper to mark the end of their sixth grade year, or telling their friends what they meant to them.

I also noticed that my students were always surprised how long it took me to "sign" their yearbooks because it took me awhile to write what I had to say. What I wrote to each student was specific to them, not a general statement. When they read what I'd written, it meant a great deal to them because it showed I really knew them and noticed the things they'd done all year.

After a couple of days of watching how they struggled to understand what they should do, I decided that the best way to explain was by giving examples. I started my own tradition that first year, and I have found that it helps my students to share their thoughts in writing with each other at the end of the year.

Every year I bring in all my high school yearbooks (10th grade - 12th grade), and I show them to my students. I read some of things my friends wrote to me, and I say how much those words still mean to me. Sometimes I tell a story about that friend and something fun we did together, or how we met and became friends. I always point out how even after all these years, the words my friends gave to me back then...are still treasures that make my heart smile. My friends loved me, and I loved them. Time and distance doesn't change the love we shared or the experiences we had together.

My students are always impressed with how well my friends wrote, how funny they were in some of the things they said, and...how my personality and who I am hasn't changed much from the way my friends described me. I sometimes think that is my students' favorite part. They love hearing my friends describe me in the same way they see me. I wasn't a different person at seventeen than I am now. I am older, more mature, and (hopefully) wiser - but I am still me. My students find comfort in that.

This year, when I brought out my yearbooks in class, I realized that my senior annual was now thirty years old. Wow. I hadn't really thought about it until I held it up to my first period class. One of my students pointed out how thirty years is a reeeeeally long time. I had to chuckle. Yes, I suppose it is, but - I pointed out to my students - look how long my friends' words have stood the test of time!

What words, I always ask, would they want someone to look back on in thirty years and be glad they were friends? What words could they say that would reach through time and distance and still make someone's heart smile? It makes them think, it makes them want to write something special to their friends, and it helps them say goodbye to another chapter in their lives.

I do believe that words are a special kind of magic, and I would like to thank all my high school friends for helping me to teach this lesson to my students every year. Most importantly, I want to thank them for sharing their words with me all those years ago. I still treasure what was written and the wonderful friendships we shared! :)

Lessons in Letting Go...

Normally, I try to blog once a week (at least) and usually try to do it on Sunday. This weekend, though, I had my hands full doing a number of things - some of them fun, some of them work (but still enjoyable). It's a busy time of the year for me.

You see, our school is almost out for the summer. My classroom needed some "pre-purging" on Saturday, and I needed to prep more than usual for this week's classes. It gets a little complicated the last week of school. Not grades, really, more with students needing my time and attention...and assurances.

Let me explain. I teach sixth grade in a middle school. Contrary to what you may have heard about students in this age range, they are a joy to teach if your heart has a calling for these precious and awkward children stuck in those "tween" years. My heart doesn't just have a calling, it has a solid commitment and love for these students. On my worst day, I love my students and love what I do! The day I don't feel that way, I'll quit...because they deserve better.

The reason they need more of my time and attention this week? For all their hoopla about summer vacation almost being here, they begin to worry about leaving me behind. They have already started getting a little long in the face, hugging me more than usual, smiling sad smiles, drawing me more pictures, and writing me notes. It is all very touching, and I love them for it.

This happens every year, and I know it's coming, so...I do my best to prepare to be more available to them. This isn't a time to need to do last minute grades or rush them through something or be too busy to stop in the hallway. No. This isn't an ordinary week for them. They need me to help them through the process of letting go and help them know they'll do great when they move on.

Now, don't let me fool you. As much as I love summer vacation, it's also a difficult time for me. I will miss them. We have shared our days together for the last nine months. I know from looking at one of my students if they are having a good day or not. I know which ones need extra encouragement, and which ones need a lesson, from time to time, on how they should treat their friends or mind their manners. I know which students I need to make sure ate breakfast in the morning and which ones might need money for lunch.

There is so much teachers do outside of actually teaching and grading and lesson planning. We have our ear to the ground and our finger on the pulse of our community of children...always. It's important. They are important.

I am sad that my time is over with this group of young people, but I love that I get the pleasure of watching them continue to grow in seventh and eighth grade. I'll get to pass them in the hallway next school year, share a smile now and then, cheer them on as they branch out into different interests and areas along the way, and - yes - I will always ask how they're doing, and if they're keeping their grades up. What can I say? Once their teacher, always their teacher. ;)

By the way, my students are unaware I am teaching them lessons in how to let go...

and, every year, I am very aware that my heart never does.