Friday, March 22, 2013

Bits and Pieces of my Mind

And Sarah realized, in that moment, she couldn't hold on to that part of her heart any longer. It was like a hand trying to hold on to the white, cotton string of a balloon - a beautiful, bright balloon that bobs and weaves with the wind, longing to be free of her grasp. "That's what I've been doing, isn't it?" she whispered to no one there, "I've been holding on to something I shouldn't have. " She looked at her closed hand and imagined the hope and the hurt, she'd carried in her heart for so long, was sitting in the palm of her hand.

She could just...let it go. Yes, it would be painful - goodbyes always are - but she could do it. Sarah closed her eyes for a moment and took a deep breath. She sighed to herself and whispered one last farewell to a fairy tale that would never come true. She opened her eyes and looked down at her closed fist, willing her fingers open to symbolize the opening of her heart - not to let something in, but to let something go. Sarah stood there for a moment with her palm held open, unsure of what to do next.

She realized she'd finally made a decision to move on,...and it hadn't killed her. Funny, she thought it would have.

Sarah walked away from that place and never returned. There were times her mind would try to take her there, but her heart refused to go. On days when she struggled (because, despite our best efforts, we all struggle sometimes to leave things in the past), she kept the image of that beautiful, bright balloon in her mind. The thought that she had set that part of her heart free to play in the wind and weave among the clouds eased her thoughts and calmed the ache in her chest. It made her smile to herself, and it let her know she was going to be all right.




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